November Cleaning

It’s been a long week.

Beginning November is a weird transition.

In one moment, you are contemplating what kind of monster or rock star you will grace Halloween parties with and the next moment, your sister-in-law is asking whether you’ll make the Turkey this year while you suddenly see a commercial that has jingle bells in the background with the new store hours to accommodate your shopping needs. Yeah, November’s weird.

And then there’s this historic election we just lived through. I can’t even begin to write how glad I am it is over. It’s a constant negotiation at social gatherings over what and how much you can talk about when it comes to politics. Never a fan of labels, I hate when people ask if I’m a Democrat or push the Palin love. I just want to talk about issues, not the blame, and I’m relieved that – finally – I can watch Grey’s Anatomy without political ads bothering me.

It’s raining yellow leaves in our backyard and our neighbors have probably pegged us the laziest Clevelanders in the history of yard raking. Yesterday, though, Nick took the day off (a nice benefit from working so many evenings and every weekend) and we took on the third floor of our house. It looked like our moving truck had vomited whatever was left in its belly onto the hard wooden floors. It’s been a little over two months since I’ve been back and yet, I confess, there is not one thing hung on our walls or box unpacked.

There is no appropriate measuring stick to adequately communicate how much I loathe packing and unpacking. I HATE MOVING THINGS. I hate the concept of it. I hate doing it. I hate it so much, I want to crawl into a fetal position and whine in a dark corner. Everything that goes into moving, I detest. The sifting through of all your junk and realizing you should drop off 1/2 of your life at a salvation army, the dust from boxes that I am allergic, the polite questions from Nick asking if I going as fast as I can – I HATE MOVING AND ALL THAT COMES WITH IT.

But, what must be done must be done. So, we tackled the third floor with a vengeance and I must say, it looks pretty darn good. It is a guest suite/Lisa’s gallery and writing floor/future children romping room. The greatest feeling was finally seeing all of my art supplies – canvas, brushes, paints, drop sheets, cleaner, paints, crayons, clear glue, adhesives, buttons, leftover denim, s/crap-booking materials, rocks, sand, rafia, paper, bows, old cards, and gift wrapping paper – in an enormous closet. For approximately 11 years, i have carted my crafty tools in beat up cardboard boxes. Much to Nick’s dismay, I have a hard time putting those things away. Since I derive much inspiration in simply looking at the vast array of my creative guns, I leave most of it out in the open, waiting for lightning to strike.

I shrieked, “LOOK NICK! I ACTUALLY HAVE A SPACE TO PUT AWAY ALL MY ART SUPPLIES! I LOVE HAVING A HOUSE! I FINALLY CAN THROW THOSE OLD BOXES AWAY AND KEEP MY ART SUPPLIES IN A CORNER OF MY OWN!”

Nick hugged me, “That’s great babe!”

But I could have sworn as he jogged down the steps, I heard him mutter under his breath, “…great for all of us…”

America, Please Stop Saying that Racism is Dead

…cuz it ain’t.  As long as one of the presidential hopefuls can call the President elect an Uncle Tom, we still got problems. Big ones.

Racists are active, voting citizens in this country.  And while I’m still riding high on our historic YES WE CAN/YES WE DID mantra, we still have to deal (and work) with these fools.
Btw, Nader, if you’re getting schooled about respect on a FOX network, then you’re beyond a political disgrace.

Anne Nixon Cooper vs. Joe the Plumber

If Joe the Plumber, the McCain supporting Ohioan who was the central force of the third and final presidential debate because of his tax questions and pursuit to buy his own business, got to meet Barack Obama, then it is TIME for Ann Nixon Cooper as well.

Ann Nixon Cooper was the central force in Obama’s first speech as president elect.  The 106 year old voter was the muse of Obama’s reflections as he walked through history using her life as a lens.  She lived through a century of change and laid out the challenges she had to place her vote, being a womyn and a womyn of color.  
In a CNN interview she said it would be an honor, “just like anyone else” to meet Barack.  I see it the other way around.  It is Barack who would carry the honor of meeting this living vessel of history.  To shake HER hand, would the be the honor of many, including Obama.
If Joe the Plumber got an individual appointment for a tax question that landed him a spot in history, I think Anne Nixon Cooper should live to meet the first Black president.
Don’t you think?  I mean, really…

I Am, Ohio is, Purple: Election Reflections

My social security number is a fun topic of conversation in the Midwest. My SSN reveals the deep east of my roots. The parts of me that peed on the NYC slides growing up, skipping down New Jersey sidewalks, and thinking Manhattan was this small dirty playground in my backyard.

I was eight when I moved to Ohio and hated every inch of the plains. The slow talkers, slow drivers, and no honking rule. In my dreams as a child, New York and Jersey were my pathways home. Now, twenty years later, most of my Filipino cousins who lived in Ohio with me eventually moved to the coasts, away from green lawns, suburbia, and conservatism. Oakland and Hoboken resonated deep in our Brown hearts of progress, diversity, and accessibility to culture with people of color.

Seattle, Boston, Los Angeles, Cincinnati, Managua, and Manila have all been mailing addresses at some point in my life. A deep wound in my marriage has been reconciling geography, where to live means questioning exactly HOW you live and what you value. Three of my closest friends live in Manhatten and often remark, “Just move here already! You visit too much.”

So much of my twenties has been wasted on wishing I was in a different color state. Erroneous, so erroneous, is placing one’s identity with geographical surrounding. As if life is as simple as that: where you live is who you are. (Not what you DO or how you take action.) What privilege, I realize, comes in choosing state and that specific state’s government. How foolish, I see now, to measure my politics with the velocity of my state’s ability to align itself with my values.

I’ve returned to Ohio, the mirror of the United States, to the northeast region. I’ve lived 3 months now in Cleveland. A post industrial city with unsung heroes and gifts, Cleveland began to show its colors to me during this Autumn season, this election year. Slowly, without any noticeable wind, I began to understand how and why I must embrace my new state and its Purple identity. How fitting that I, once Republican, once Democrat, and registered Independent reside in a state that changes with the times. Sometimes disappointing, sometimes slow, but always reflective of the state of progress of the larger picture. Ohio is a continual work in progress.

Cleveland is the blue horse, a lover of Buckeye football, a city of trains and an empty downtown. Cleveland is a sorely unimpressive lakeside developer with stains of unemployment and unfulfilled projects. But, like the rest of the nation today, Cleveland is a site of promise. I saw it yesterday in a mother who said she was an at-risk pregnant mother who couldn’t walk, but showed up to volunteer to sit and make phone calls for the Obama campaign. I saw four children playing together, all different ethnicities and colors, yelling on a non-descript street, testing their knowledge of Spanish and Japanese words with one another.

Ohio, in its quiet strength of home and corn fields, is also home to a keen (buck)eye to recognize when change is needed. From Red, it turned Blue. The pundits keep calling it a traditionally Red state, but it’s not. There are many activists and progressive minds in the deep “South” of Cincinnati and fighting the fight of racism in Over the Rhine as found in the NGOs of Brooklyn. There are writers of every creed, bleeding their way to be heard, just as the dreamers of San Francisco. There are fresh bakeries, vegan chefs, sidewalks of Spanglish, and local farmers as there are in the coastal cities. We are mixed. We are Purple. This is why Ohio reflects the nation. There are skyscrapers in the distance of the harvest and the hues of yellow, orange, and red as the sun sets drops a majestic background of peace and negotiation between farming fathers and scholarly daughters.

There may not be an Empire State building, or even a red carpet invitation with a Midwestern zip code, but I can promise you this of Ohio: it always tells the truth, unabashedly, of where it stands. And I may not like it. I may rip the Ten Commandments billboards down and curse the SUV drivers roaming the flat roads, but Ohio reveals all the superficial and best parts of our journey.

I wondered last night, on the couch with Adonis, where I’d rather be in witnessing the first Black president win the general election. We contemplated a five hour drive to Grant Park or maybe even D.C. But when I saw the pundits claim Ohio blue, I smiled in the way I have when I reconciled stark differences with an old friend. Humbled, eager, and ready, I’ve reached a cheesy reconciliation with my state and realized that I do not belong in a permanent shade of blue region. That would be erasing my years as a pro-life marcher, the years of exploring Catholic dogma, the Clinton tears, and my controversial Bush vote of 2000. I don’t want to erase my Red. It’s changed, but it’s still me.

The color Purple has long been my favorite. And today, especially, I regard the mix of the two as I watch my beloved state hand the election to Barack Obama with the grumbling and rejoicing that can only be heard in the neighborhoods of mixed identities, my home, my state, Ohio.

O-H

Letter #1

Dear Veronica,

Someday you’ll read this and I hope that when you do, my words will make no sense at all. I hope that you actually throw your head back in such laughter that I even got emotionally invested in this moment because in the time that you absorb my words, that period will have come to pass a mentality of such openness and progression, this letter is filed archaic.
You’re only an image in my mind, a daughter who I hope to meet in the future. I think of you often in when I am working for a better place or even making a lousy choice. In either instance, I wonder how my actions will affect you.
Today is November 4, 2008 and these hours rest on the anxious ballots across the United States as we elect a new leader of our nation. You’ll read in history books that all sorts of records were broken – even now, before I know who has won the general election – so much has transpired that has changed the face of this nation and so much is still going to change in the years before you and I officially meet.
You come from a family who supports two parties – Republicans and Democrats – which is why Sunday dinners always last too long with your cousins and Titas and Titos. We have much to discuss.
It’s important to me for you to know why this day is so important. For eight years, I’ve been changing my mind. I’ve been looking for the best and ideal political environment and I now realize that not only is that never going to happen, but that’s not what I should be living for. It’s not the end result of perfection or the ideal outcome I’m looking for, what matters most is what I did in these years to make this place better for you.
I want you to know that I voted today. I voted for a presidential candidate for my third election and I voted Democrat. I’ve voted Republican before, even identified as such. Voting Democratic, however, is not as significant as the lessons I’ve learned about laws, infrastructure and the reality of how the system works in this country and around the world. If you are my daughter, most likely, you will be a daughter of privilege. You will be a person of education, services, healthcare, and choices. With these options, you must apply yourself and learn for yourself how this world will work for those around you. Learning for myself of how this world works changed the way I live, the way I vote, the way I love.
This day, I witnessed an excitement in every kind of person imaginable. I witnessed a respect between folks of difference, across race and party lines. It was the first day of a political event that I felt a part of, not a spectator. Of every ethnicity, religion, ability, I saw people working the voting booths. Pregnant women, men in business suits, the elderly in wheelchairs, families with strollers – nearly everyone showed up today.
And so, my dear, you continue to remain a dream for me. A bright dream which keeps me walking and serving those around me, hoping someday, that you will do the same. And you will tell me funny stories of the people you met on election day. I will tell you the day I worked for the first black president of the Unites States of America and by then you will wonder what the hell the big damn deal was in 2008.
Your father and I bought a bottle of champagne and splurged on a package of gourmet cheese. Your father loves George Stephanopoulos and I love anyone but the Fox anchors. We hope that is one of those nights we’ll remember the rest of our lives and bore you to tears about what we witnessed and lived through.
Love,
Mom

Happy Halloween

Candy corn rules.

Don’t even think about giving out Brach’s candy.

Give the Tootsie Rolls to the older ones with no costumes who don’t bother to say Trick or Treat.

Play the Halloween movie theme music in the background all day.

Forgo fake eyelashes. I always get an eye infection when I try them.