that whenever I see a bookstore, am about to head into a store that screams SALE SALE SALE, of think about the winter holidays, I have to go to the bathroom.

I have learned:

When a person gets excited, the body reacts by producing adrenaline and hormones that start the peristaltic movement of the bowels. In turn, the waste in one’s body is pushed down, thus signaling the need to defecate.

I’ve spent most of my life excited, if that tells you anything.