After the book tour and consuming countless hours of facilitated dialogues about healing, suffering, and trauma, I decide to go on a sugar cleanse.  To be truthful, I don’t know why, but in my body, I feel the need to release things that aren’t mine.  I’m not sure it’s possible to explain it well over a a computer, or really in words, but I knew I had to do something when my sleep turned into interrupted confused states, and my once razor sharp memory began fuzzing out simple details.  I’ve had body work done, I even went to acupuncture.  I’ve run, planked, yoga’ed, and drank more water than I ever had and, still, something(s) are lingering.  I need some thing(s) to be released.  Things that aren’t mine. Trauma that isn’t mine that is clinging to my cells, draining me, weighing me down.

A contributor from the anthology and new friend, adrienne maree brown, recently did a 21 day sugar cleanse and to be honest what attracted me to it were her Facebook posts about how difficult it was.  As strange as this sounds, I wanted something else to take my mind off the stress of moving, the unknown of going back to school, the vestiges of the anthology’s emotional turmoil.  I began prepping a few days ago and experienced terrible withdrawal symptoms.  I had diarrhea, chills, pseudo flu symptoms without the body aches.  That was just the prep.  Then came the headache of all headaches.  I could barely function that day and Nick wondered if I was taking on too much.  I could barely care for Isaiah.  Then, boom, the next day I woke up refreshed, energized, and my face feeling as smooth as a baby’s bum.  I took the weekend to enjoy the holiday and eat some favorite foods (filipino kare kare with rice! artichoke and spinach dip on pita chips! a margarita!) and managed to steer clear of marshmallow peeps and Easter candy.

Today was my first day.  And the one thing that saved me?  I WAS PREPARED.

After an egg white omelette with fresh spinach, tomatoes, and avocado, I prepped an organic grass fed beef chili with beans for lunch, and then traveled with a can of lentils, brown rice, chicken, and spinach for dinner.

It worked.  I wasn’t hungry at all.  My energy was even and felt attentive and aware of my body.

My intention for this cleanse is prompted by intense curiosity, need for challenge, but primarily health.  After nearly 2 months of heavy travel, I feel the need to make my own food, drink more water, sleep well, and rid my body of emotional and physical toxins.

I’ll be writing letters to adrienne to help keep my focus and accountability up.  I’ll post them here on this blog and hope you enjoy the journey.

Here are some tips from adrienne that I will be incorporating, and here is the cleanse that I will be doing.  I can tell you this right now: I’ll need the support and the company.